Sunday, June 29, 2014

致命的误会

有次跟长豆聊起他奥地利的高中同学,学校采取宽容的态度,基本上学生没有制服,发型也不受限。老师不会干涉学生表现自我的机会,留胡子也不打紧,不像我们这边,学生被重重条规五花大绑。当然青春期的学生觉得苦闷压抑,但由于东方家长是即使举脚也同意,左右夹攻,学生唯有屈服。

不过很令我惊震的是,从长豆口中吐出关于大麻(marijuana/cannabis/hashish/THC)的立场。在我们这边,当然是犯法的,不容置疑。大家都相信,从大麻启步,很多青少年就容易沉沦下去,继续追求更亢奋的药物或毒品。

长豆自己没有碰,可是他知道校里不少同学有接触,也有管道买得到。像他这样的乡下男孩,对大麻的看法居然是同意放松管制,“滥用吗啡海洛因或受管制药物是不对的,但是我觉得大麻还可以啦。”

最近有一套青少年的美国片,《The Perks of Being a Wallflower》,长豆很喜爱,美国美眉奇异果也是心爱得很。我很好奇他们为什么会喜欢,因为影片中描写高中社交生活,几乎把我吓死了。禁不住在跟长豆和另一个美国美眉聊观后感时,问他们在美国学校里的情形真的是如描绘的吗?在欧洲也是一样?那些舞会里流行的大麻, 没有节制的酒精和肢体‘接触’


很明显的他们发现我不太喜欢戏里描写主人翁的“痛苦”,这两人闪闪缩缩地说大约是的,在学校不得人心,没有人缘关系,是致命的啊!---所以舞会里,别人递过来的违禁品,没有应酬的话,实在太逊了!

大约可以认为这是一般高中生的普遍看法。大麻是小case,无关紧要的,很难上瘾,不会害死人的啦。何况,大众偶像们根本在炫耀哈草的消息,动不动就在媒体上看到,即使被抓包,也是很光荣的,粉丝们反而更尊崇他们呢!真是价值观错乱的时代。

A LETTER TO PARENTS (from National Institute on Drug Abuse)
 
We at the National Institute on Drug Abuse (NIDA)
are pleased to offer these two short booklets for par-
ents and children to review the scientific facts about
marijuana: (1)Marijuana: Facts Parents Need to Know
and (2)Marijuana: Facts for Teens. 

Although it is best
to talk about drugs when children are young—since
that is when drug use often begins—it is never too
late to start the conversation.
Marijuana remains the most abused illegal substance
among youth. By the time they graduate high
school, about 46
percent of U.S. teens will have tried
marijuana at least once in their lifetime. 

Although use
among teens dropped dramatically in the previous
decade (to a prevalence of about 12.4 percent for
past-month use in 2007), adolescent marijuana use
is again on the upswing. In 2013, nearly 23 percent
of high school seniors were current marijuana users,
and 6.5 percent used marijuana daily. 

The annual
Monitoring the Future survey, which has been
tracking teen attitudes and drug use since 1975,
shows that use of marijuana over time is directly
related to how safe teens perceive the drug to be;
currently the number of teens who think marijuana
users risk harming themselves is declining. This,
despite growing scientific evidence that marijuana
use during the teen years can permanently lower
a person’s IQ and interfere with other aspects of 
functioning and well-being.
Survey results show that we still have a long way to go
in our efforts to prevent marijuana use and avoid the
toll it can take on a young person’s life. NIDA recog
-nizes that parents have an important role in this effort
and can strongly influence their children’s attitudes
and behaviors. 

However, the subject of marijuana use
has become increasingly difficult to talk about—in
part, because of the mixed messages being conveyed
by the passage of medical marijuana laws and legal-
ization of marijuana in some States. In addition, many
parents of today’s teens may have used marijuana
when they were younger, which could make talk
-ing openly and setting definitive rules about its use
more difficult. 
Talking to our children about drug use is not always
easy, but it is crucial. You can also get involved in
your community and seek out drug abuse prevention
programs that you and your child can participate in
together. Sometimes, just beginning the conversation
is the hardest part. I hope these booklets can help.

当长豆这辈长大为人父母后,恐怕就会面对如文里所述,因为自己曾经使用过,如何有效地劝告自己的孩子不该碰这些诱惑?

叫我想起读过的一本书,读后心酸得无可附加,为人父母啊。

http://book.douban.com/subject/3824748/


世界上最悲苦的是莫非就是如此了,孩子为什么你要碰毒品?是因为爸妈的错吗?



8 comments:

  1. 我覺得華人和西方人在這毒害的問題上,和歷史很有關係。

    西方人的毒物是從醫藥發展出來的副產品,他們對於這物品是存有矛盾心態的,畢竟是自己創造出來的,想接受又怕被濫用,一代代傳下來都覺得問題可以靠後天解決。

    而華人,受的毒害從鴉片戰爭中開始,讓人見慣了毒品帶來的禍,不只是毁掉個人,還牽連了整個家庭,所以都會從小就阻止孩子碰。我有個香港同事,說他父母剛帶他移民至澳時,告誡他說:你以後長大在外怎麼使壞都好,就是別碰毒品一口,不然我們連親人都作不成!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 在 你本身呢?
      能够宽容到什么程度?有想过那天发生在自己的小不点身上么?
      我曾经以为不可能在周遭出现, 候来发现其实这个担忧很容易就"实现"。孩子的社交将会越来越杂, 父母的一廂情愿, 或会太单纯。
      洋人家长说是尊重孩子的选择, 即使他想尝试抽烟或大麻, 或滥交; 等发生失控了才找专家处理。有点让孩子学习自我承担的味道。

      Delete
  2. 《The Perks of Being a Wallflower》是 EMMA WATSON 作品?! 我要去找來看了。。 呵呵

    我看 《EASY A》,EMMA STONE 作品,也是描述美國校園對性的態度。。。

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh boy, 我搞错对象了,楼上的答复应该对你讲的。凭感觉,坑还是单身吧?

      我也很喜欢emma watson在哈利波特的角色,可是这些小朋友长大后参演的电影,我还是很难移情啊,还接受不了他们长大后的变化。

      有套西班牙电影《Mentiras y gordas 》(2009)-爱情大谎言,讲的也是少年一箩筐性呀、毒品呀、滥交呀,不断的荒淫。经过如此狂欢才长大,算是尽情生活吗?我觉得是借口。
      里面有我喜欢的演员--mario cascas呢,可喜欢的是从《Grupo 7》开始,当他不再卖肉后。

      Delete
  3. 不久前我看《华尔街之狼》( The Wolf of Wall Street),里头把毒品的滥用,描绘得淋漓尽致。。。对他们来说太普遍了。

    纯粹是电影,也不要想得太恐怖,事实上并非如此。。。有时我觉得他们在开放中正视问题,而我们在束缚中逃避问题。

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 其实不纯粹是电影场景而已,我之所以会提到长豆的看法,代表的是,普遍欧美的少年观念里,大麻真的是无所谓的泛泛罢了。他们被很多影视作品喂大,很多电影明暗都有为大麻站台,明星三番五次也呼吁解禁大麻。
      居于群众压力,执法不力,有些美国州属也已解禁,那种趋势,上面的统计,近半数的少年试过大麻,那种渗透,那种获取的方便,我认为不是杞人忧天的。

      题外。你看了《Captain Philip》吗?里头的苏玛利亚海盗,借着咀嚼叶子来亢奋,提高勇气,跟事实有差吗?
      在阿富汗,盛产罂粟的国家,那些圣战英雄,吗啡可以提高战斗力,让他们以少战多,冬天里拖鞋布衫打败盟军的正规兵士。
      毒品跟恐怖主义联手,不敢想象。

      Delete
  4. 我不是單身,但沒孩子。若真有,我也會同樣告誡他們說有些東西最好不要碰,自己如果有類似的"上癮"(任何事物)可以和他們講解。

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 我胆子小,不是最好不要碰,而是打死都不能碰。如你朋友的家长说的,跟你反脸都有份。很多少年高估自己的定力,以为浅尝即止,结果一失足成千古恨,翻身不得。

      Delete

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